Instead of two years humming songs like, Giving You The Best That I Got, You Belong To Me, and Good Love; I spent a month humming: You Suck 'Cause You Stood Me Up, I'm Not A Stalker I'm Just Calling You A Lot and Penis In My Thigh. Yes that's right Penis In My Thigh, during which I got to lead the audience in singing along with the chorus:
"Penis in my thigh, penis in my thigh, penis in." and repeat!
I had the opportunity to work with some very talented actress- singers like...
We garnered a good review in Columbus, I arrived home safely, and then my landlady...
Dear Reader you ask, "Your landlady who opened your door (in a non-emergency) and left it unlocked the entire week you were in Israel doing the Rhonda Hansome Comedy Divorced & Bitter Tour?"
Why yes, that exact same landlady who ignored my requests for a lease and regular rent receipts. She wants me out of my apartment so she can have it - NOW.
I need an apartment, NOW. So all three of you spread the word that I'm looking to pay $800 - $900 per month for a 1 bedroom (yeah I'm dreaming) in a not crazy neighborhood. The joke's on me. In the 9 years since I've returned to Bed-Stuy, it's become so gentrified I can't afford to live here anymore.
If you hear of anything under $1200 a month give me a holler!!
Rhonda Hansome is an actress, writer, director and stand-up comic. You may soon see her doing all of those things on a street corner near you.
My suggestion: the Bedford Park area in the Bronx. D and 4 trains stop at Bedford Park Blvd. It's the stop for Lehman College and Botanical Gardens. Even there, some renovated apartments are costly but you can still find a deal.
ReplyDeleteThat's exactly where I looked at a place today - Bedford Park. We shall see...
ReplyDeletetoo much for coincidence. good luck finding your new home.
ReplyDeleteRhonda sorry to hear that. A landlord did that to me once too. Good luck with your search.
ReplyDeleteSorry about the apartment. Best with your search! ~S
ReplyDelete