By Samantha DeRose
Paula Deen has taken a minimum wage job working the fryer at McDonald's.
Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachman have left their respective husbands, are moving to New York, are picking out a china pattern, and have set a wedding date for November 13, 2013. John Boehner is the ring bearer and Antonin Scalia will perform the nuptials after which the two gentlemen will be flying to California to tie the knot.
President Obama, Edward Snowden, and Vladimir Putin have set a date for a beer summit in late July. Donald Trump will be providing his own microbrew.
Chris Christie is quitting his current gig to teach in a public school in Paterson, NJ.
Kim Kardashian has been meeting with June Boo Boo about child-rearing. June suggested a steady diet of Nerds, Pixie Stix, and Mountain Dew.
Til next week ya'll.
PS - A big thank you to all of the comics (Maribeth Mooney, Amy Beckerman, Cara Kilduff, Chris Doucette, Jeff Lawrence, William Mullin and BearDonna) and audience who came to my show on the 29th... And an extra big thank you to my sister She's, Rhonda and Mindy who came out to support the show.
I'll be hosting at Tierney's in Montclair, NJ on July 14 at 8pm still wearing my flip-flop and summer orthopedic boot.
This was quite amusing. I did notice your foot and wondered what happened. You're such a soldier.
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