Speaking Human
One of the things I appreciate about living in a regular
neighborhood that doesn’t price people out is how real it is. That’s not to say everything is tasteful, but
it’s out there. We know who walks around
selling cheaper cigarettes, who deals, who goes to church, who turns tricks,
who is good with animals, who is a great babysitter, who has AIDS, who is
likely to go to jail, who is likely to go to college, etc.
It’s not always a polite neighborhood. Almost everyone gets called a nigga. My son was once referred to as “that white
nigga who dresses gangsta,” and my dog was once spoken about with “this nigga
is barking at me.” Women do get muttered
to as they walk by certain groups. I do
what I can when I can to leave my footprint.
I once spoke to a married man neighbor who typically commented in
Spanish at women as they walked by, and from how he stared, I assumed it was
about their asses. He saw me see him
once, and he defensively said, “I just said hello.” He knows I don’t speak Spanish. But I do speak human. I told him, “Whatever you said made her feel
uncomfortable. She has a right to walk
without being made uncomfortable. She pays
taxes. It’s her world too.” He truly found that so funny. He thought the line about her paying taxes
was hilarious. My face remained
serious. He realized I meant it. He isn’t unique, but someone has to put
different thoughts out there. These men
don’t harass me. They mostly knew me as
a married woman which shielded me. Now
that I’m divorced, they still have their “respect” since I am a neighbor, and
they see me as a person usually … as much as this particular pack can.
I still prefer seeing what I am dealing with rather than being
in a quiet tree-lined neighborhood with no stores nearby, no witnesses, too
creepy for me though it may look prettier in terms of cleanliness, lawns, and
modern housing. I also prefer to live
amongst people who in general are not pretentious and judgmental over
superficial things. And I love my
24-hour bodegas (whether Hispanic or Arab owned, I still call them
bodegas). I like that when I need to go
out in the middle of the night to the store that I’m not the only person out
there. That feels safer to me.
One day, I went out, and on the sidewalk, written in colored
chalk, I read, “Please help. Trying to avoid eviction. Please help.”
That same weekend, a man down the side street was demonstrating his
wares while shouting, “You got troubles; I got bubbles.”
His spirit made me and many others smile past
our troubles, at least for a moment. Later, I saw a teenage
girl buy a can of cat food and open it for a stray. At that moment, I remember thinking, I don’t
care what anyone says about the Bronx or where everyone originally came from,
these are my people. Whoever doesn’t get
it, doesn’t get it. Different life
experience. My grandfather could’ve
easily been the man selling bubbles, determined to earn dinner for his family
in some way that is neither illegal nor immoral. The girl using her money to feed the stray
cat has been me.
My
grandmother would take leftover food to the alley for the cats. It means a lot when the person doing the giving
doesn’t have much him or herself. Sharing
what one has is typically how poor folks live.
Some say it is what keeps us poor.
I think it is what makes us rich.
A man a few blocks away hung an extension cord out his window so his downstairs neighbor could use some electricity to keep his refrigerator going and his food fresh when he couldn’t pay his electric bill. These are not the Bronx stories you will read about in the newspaper, yet these are the daily realities.
Sometimes, people’s resourcefulness and creativity in the face
of need deeply impress me. I saw this on
craigslist, and, damn, could I relate!
Posted: 2013-03-27, 11:40AM EDT
looking
for sculptor to make fake teeth (Bronx)
Hi,
This is highly embarrassing, but I have a few missing teeth and obviously I don't have the money for a dentist.
I am more than willing to pay. I just need the replacement teeth for when I am working not to eat.
Any ideas? I do not want a something that I have to wear over my whole set of existing teeth. I tried one of those from Amazon
and it was awful :)
This is highly embarrassing, but I have a few missing teeth and obviously I don't have the money for a dentist.
I am more than willing to pay. I just need the replacement teeth for when I am working not to eat.
Any ideas? I do not want a something that I have to wear over my whole set of existing teeth. I tried one of those from Amazon
and it was awful :)
- Location: Bronx
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
Posting ID: 3706814287
Posted: 2013-03-27, 11:40AM EDT
Well this past week had me without my internet, cable tv, and
land line service. I’d fallen behind and
had to always give priority to rent. One
of my jobs doesn’t pay us for weeks off, so I go through dry periods. Sometimes, I am more prepared than other times
to avert crises. This wasn’t one of
those times. By midweek, I was able to
pay up. I was so glad to have everything
back, and then that very day, Con Ed shut me off, so I was back to
nothing. I had candles and a cell
phone. I charged my cell phone and used the
computer at one of my jobs. Daylight
lasts longer now which helped also. I
would remind myself that I have running water, a working toilet, a place to
call home with a door and locks. I was
managing and trying not to feel like a spoiled American. I didn’t burst until after paying Con Ed and
being told the power would be back on within 4 hours, and it wasn’t. That was harder to tolerate. I paid.
I was led to believe I’d have power that night. I couldn’t stand the feeling of turning on the
light switch and nothing happening. I
spent a night at a friend’s house just for light, tv, and wonderful company.
In my life, I've had much more important things taken from me than conveniences, so as frustrating as this was, I'm not sure I call this an emergency.
The people wanting to help me out the most can’t afford to. Eventually, Con Ed told me my power was on
and that my super had to turn on the circuit breaker. Now I had to find him. I found one of the men who assist him. I was under the impression the assistant only
spoke Spanish. I was glad to be
wrong. We understood each other enough
to get through this. He gave me the
super’s phone number, and he told me when the Con Ed guy had been there. He made a point of telling me the guy came
for another tenant also. When I told him
I had owed a lot of money, he said, “I know how it is. No worry.
Is not only you.” It didn’t
matter to me that his verbs may or may not agree with his subjects or if his
sentence has a subject. We speak human.
Great blog Mindy and great timing. A heart-warming story of real people pulling together couldn't be more welcome than right now.
Real people problems, real people caring.
You two women, thank you. Being heard and understood.
What more can I can ask for.
Beautiful, Mindy! ~S
thanks, Samantha.
Born and raised in Da Bronx. Mindy, you discribe it PERFECTLY! Living in Manhattan now, feel like a fish out of water :>). Susy