Blogging from the ER

By Samantha DeRose

Today's blog was supposed to be about oxymorons.  I was inspired when I read, "Good Monday, Everyone!" on someone's Facebook wall and thought, "Well, hey!  Good Monday is an oxymoron as Good and Monday are opposites!  Why don't I write about all of the moronic oxies in my life!"

But as the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray, today's blog brought to you by Oxymorons was not to be.

As it turns out, my son, Ethan, whacked his head last Wednesday on a desk in school and ended up with a slight concussion.  He was out of school for the rest of the week returning today.  I was informed that he exhibited confusion (more than normal) at school, so the doctor thought it best to have his head checked (I've been saying that for slightly over a decade) at the ER... just as a precaution.  JUST AS A PRECAUTION!  Try telling that to his already jittery grandmother ... somebody please get her a few glasses of Dubonnet before we get home to calm her down.

So here we are waiting...waiting...waiting...in Hackensack.  Who needs a house out in Hackensack?  I'll tell you who,  Billy Joel.  No ONE!  I just need to get home to cook dinner, write my lesson plans, write a new set, let the dog out for an overdue crap and I NEED THE CHIPMUNK MOVIE THAT'S PLAYING OVER AND OVER AND OVER IN THIS ER TO BREAK...PERMANENTLY!  And I need my kid to be o.k.

Good Monday, Everyone!  I say that with love and oxymoronic affection.

Here's how we are amusing the waiting room patrons as we patiently (get it... double entendre) await our turn...

P.S.  Ethan was just asked by the medical student what he ate today.  Ethan replied, "Well, I didn't finish my breakfast before school so I only had one waffle and for lunch I had the chips with ground beef.  OH!  But wait.  I didn't eat the cheese because it was hard and disgusting."