I’d been feeling a bit mechanical lately. Like my essential communication is
abbreviated and reduced to reciting pin numbers, Social Security digits and
snarks (snarky remarks) of 140 characters or less. I don’t interact. I interface, with devices much smarter
than me: tablet, laptop, Metrocard
vending machine. I asked a human
bank teller to make a simple correction to my account and was told, “that can
only be done by phone.” I looked
at the cobwebs growing on several bank officers sitting behind me and tamped
down my raging woman, raring to tell somebody - anybody how to run things 2%
better for my convenience.
It’s official. I now automatically respond to an assortment
of electronic beeps, buzzes and alarms emitted by my (smarter than me) phone
that tell me where to be, when and whom to see and why. It’s a robotic like response to a
technological, digital, mechanical world.
But blogging is a longer form of communication. It is (hopefully) connecting. I look forward to every deadline as
another opportunity to let my, newly highlighted hair down, and tell as many folks as possible (all
3 of you! ) how I roll. I feel
great about my blog and the musings, revelations and rants of sister bloggers. So when a friend sent me an announcement
about her first blog, I shared her excitement. I read it and
wanted to wish her blogging happiness with a self-promoting comment. The moment after submitting my comment,
which included She So Funny. Blogspot.com, my good feelings and even my sense
of humanity was challenged! I was
told to enter a series of letters that appeared to be mid-trip on mushrooms.
I have to prove I am not a robot?
After collecting my dignity like a worn tattered shawl, I
did as instructed. I mechanically
entered the data requested. I held my breath while wondering, am I
still human or have I morphed into
an automaton in denial of mother cyborg?
The screen changed.
Somewhere, somehow my response was deemed human! I am not a robot, at least not
yet. But when I start getting
parts replaced, a hip here, a knee there, trans-vaginal mesh wherever… I may
have only the photo above to remind me of other days; after all resistance is
futile.
I'm just waiting to get my own unwomaned air vehicle (UVA) drone so I can spy on myself while I blog. When I ponder our new technology and how it makes me feel, I remember my mom in the early stages of Alzheimer's --because she said it best. Believing her phone was being tapped, she called the phone company -- only to hear this robotic voice ask her to choose an option over and over and over again. She became very confused, frustrated, and indignant as she admonished the automated recording, "You're so RUDE! You keep repeating yourself as though you didn't even know I was here. You're just RUDE, RUDE, RUDE!!!!"
I HATE those things, because I am visually disabled no left optic nerve and a bleeding right retina makes Reverend a 90% Blind Woman and it will get worse as we progress in time, but we deal with it - strong as I might - one day at a time... Hey Kids - I see SPOTS !!! It's really BLOOD !!! But it looks like traveling BUGS, because it moves because my right eye moves, so the spots move... How FUNNY... Is it BUGS or is it Polka Dots in Blood Red or was that Black - as it really looks to me from in there...
But back to the ROBOT CRAP - you know, you a visually disadvantaged person, these things are a PAIN IN THE ASS !!! Did the IDIOT who thought up this IDEA, THINK of the VISUALLY IMPAIRED and the FRUSTRATION they would experience with these STUPID THINGS !!! NO THEY DID NOT !!! Because I frequently cannot get into the sites I need to access the sites I need to access - because of these STUPID ROBOTS !!!
So, Rhonda, this was a good column... These things SUCKS BIG ONES !!! YES KIDS, even a real life PRIEST - and if you knew me - soon you all will - says things like that - because this is one CLERIC that is the TRUTH and nothing but... So, when I have to say some words, I says them, loud and clear, for the world to hear... So, if these ROBOTS frustrate you too, shout it with me BABIES - THESE ROBOTS SUCK BIG ONES !
Love to all... And of course to my Rhonda - SHELLFISH - soon...
Rev. Marine
Thank you Lois & Marine for sharing. Love you!